Love Still Missing

LOVE Still  Missing 


***


Remember I was a toddler 

Could barely use words

Yet knew

Something 

Very wrong

My home 

Was not home

Love was misting

I suffocated

In Dark

Silence

Crying 


At night  

Going to bed 

Thumb In mouth 

Covered

Curled ball

Egg Nest

Warm 

Under

Grandmother's 

Quilt


Floating capsule

Spinning Universes

Silent spaces

Stars Stars Stars

Felt No pain

Distant

Frozen

Felt

Nothing


Upon

Arriving 

Nourishing 

Green World

Supportive of life

Would be reanimated 

Loved 

New Eden

Each night 

Soothed 

Dreaming of Love

Fell asleep


Listening 

My Raccoon 

Stuffed radio 

My best friend 

Grandfather gave me

We cuddled together 

Music taught me

How to feel


One day mom 

Angry

Punished me 

Would not buy 

Batteries 

Anymore 

My raccoon 

Died


Dreaming 

Life away 

Inside

My egg

Cracking open 

After many years

New world!

New world!

I was reanimated 

Was ready 

Love

Be Loved

Alive 

Joy


Stepping out 

Heart Bursting

Open wide

My little boy 

Shiney 

Ready

Living 


Awakening

Heard violence

Everyone 

Hurting 

Killing 

Each other

In Horror 

Realized 

Awoke

Too early 


I screamed

Panicking

My Egg 

Was gone 

No going back

No going back


World 

Burning down

My inner 

Landscape 

Broken 

Mirror 

Shattered

Thousand 

Pieces

Lookin

Asking 

Who am I 

Gearing

Nothing

My open

Heart

Shut


Brave

Fighting 

My way Forward 

All life

Alone 

Cruel world

Never found A

Heart of gold 


My dreams 

Faded 

Searching

Little boy gone

Sands of time

Running 

Through

Hands 

My Soul

Blown out 

In the rain 


I Never 

Found that love

My shattered 

Suffering 

Heart

Weeping 

Nurtures

Poems 

Percolating 

Upwards

Helping 

Others

In this my

Life has

Meaning


But my cup 

Remains empty

I'm dying of thirst

Hell I've known 

Beauty I experienced

Across this Spinning 

Globe

Is where 

My poems

Arise

I give them

Away

Others

You 

In this my 

Life has

Meaning 

Brings all 

 

I am the sacrifice 

A Ransom 

Offering

Upon

Life's 

Altar

Burning 

My

Sins



Perhaps 

In A cruel world

We  may all  be

Missing 


My heart open

It still opens 

Wide as sky

Spacious 

Crashing 

Falling 

Hurt easy 

Spiraling 

Downward 

Darknesses 

Hideaway 

Lair 

Abyss


Dreams

Fading

Empty 

Inside

My

Love 

Dies


I'm missing 

Who have I become

Where did I go

I don't know

I don't know

I don't know

In Mirror 

See No

Recognition 


Why is life

Harsh

Baren

Cruel 

For my 

Little boy

We are all

Broken

Lost


My Little boy

He ran away

Long Long

Ago


Looking out

Under 

Overcast Skies

My inner sun hides

Grown older now 

Heart colder

Children

Grown

Older

LOVE 

Remains 

Missing 

LOVE

Still 

Missing 


***


David Arndt October 7, 2022


***

Artwork Floating Egg by Craig Brewer

LOVE Still Missing 

***

Remember I was a toddler 
Could barely use words
Yet knew
Something 
Very wrong
My home 
Was not home
Love was misting
I suffocated
In Dark
Silence
Crying 

At night  
Going to bed 
Thumb In mouth 
Covered
Curled ball
Egg Nest
Warm 
Under
Grandmother's 
Quilt

Floating capsule
Spinning Universes
Silent spaces
Stars Stars Stars
Felt No pain
Distant
Frozen
Felt
Nothing

Upon
Arriving 
Nourishing 
Green World
Supportive of life
Would be reanimated 
Loved 
New Eden
Each night 
Soothed 
Dreaming of Love
Fell asleep

Listening 
My Raccoon 
Stuffed radio 
My best friend 
Grandfather gave me
We cuddled together 
Music taught me
How to feel

One day mom 
Angry
Punished me 
Would not buy 
Batteries 
Anymore 
My raccoon 
Died

Dreaming 
Life away 
Inside
My egg
Cracking open 
After many years
New world!
New world!
I was reanimated 
Was ready 
Love
Be Loved
Alive 
Joy

Stepping out 
Heart Bursting
Open wide
My little boy 
Shiney 
Ready
Living 

Awakening
Heard violence
Everyone 
Hurting 
Killing 
Each other
In Horror 
Realized 
Awoke
Too early 

I screamed
Panicking
My Egg 
Was gone 
No going back
No going back

World 
Burning down
My inner 
Landscape 
Broken 
Mirror 
Shattered
Thousand 
Pieces
Lookin
Asking 
Who am I 
Gearing
Nothing
My open
Heart
Shut

Brave
Fighting 
My way Forward 
All life
Alone 
Cruel world
Never found A
Heart of gold 

My dreams 
Faded 
Searching
Little boy gone
Sands of time
Running 
Through
Hands 
My Soul
Blown out 
In the rain 

I Never 
Found that love
My shattered 
Suffering 
Heart
Weeping 
Nurtures
Poems 
Percolating 
Upwards
Helping 
Others
In this my
Life has
Meaning

But my cup 
Remains empty
I'm dying of thirst
Hell I've known 
Beauty I experienced
Across this Spinning 
Globe
Is where 
My poems
Arise
I give them
Away
Others
You 
In this my 
Life has
Meaning 
Brings all 
 
I am the sacrifice 
A Ransom 
Offering
Upon
Life's 
Altar
Burning 
My
Sins


Perhaps 
In A cruel world
We may all be
Missing 

My heart open
It still opens 
Wide as sky
Spacious 
Crashing 
Falling 
Hurt easy 
Spiraling 
Downward 
Darknesses 
Hideaway 
Lair 
Abyss

Dreams
Fading
Empty 
Inside
My
Love 
Dies

I'm missing 
Who have I become
Where did I go
I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
In Mirror 
See No
Recognition 

Why is life
Harsh
Baren
Cruel 
For my 
Little boy
We are all
Broken
Lost

My Little boy
He ran away
Long Long
Ago

Looking out
Under 
Overcast Skies
My inner sun hides
Grown older now 
Heart colder
Children
Grown
Older
LOVE 
Remains 
Missing 
LOVE
Still 
Missing 

***

David Arndt October 7, 2022

***
Artwork Floating Egg by Craig Brewer



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