An adventure with the Beat Neil Cassidy, the American Buddha Log Lady from Twin peaks, car Repair the Fear of God and much more…

From a few years back, maybe 2018…

🤣

An adventure with the Beat Neil Cassidy, the American Buddha Log Lady from Twin peaks, car Repair the Fear of God and much more…

***

Floating Down The River Of Life

******

I jumped into the river for the first time, near Garland's bridge in Lincoln, VT.

Tater, so cold woke me up and then the craziest thing happened, I saw Log Lady out of the corner of my eye.

Who is Log Lady? 

If you don't know, it's okay. Just know that She in some ways is an American Buddha, or a propheit of the future, and she divines the future with a magic log that she carries with her at all times, and people think she's crazy but I know the truth about her and so I'm sharing here.

Oh one more thing, everything I'm writing is actually happened, I'm not making up anything.

First thing I thought:

"Car troubles, something is going to go wrong with my car."

And I was right, the small problem that needed fixing had become replacing the rear rotors, brake pads, and calipers. I went to another mechanic for a second opinion, he says the drive shaft needs replacing, $1100.

At this point I don't believe the drive shaft replacement narrative, I return to the mechanic I trust, he says nothing wrong with the drive shaft, I decide to wait while they do the work.

Then it happens, I see Log Lady out in the woods beckoning me.

So I slip out of the shop into the woods and Log Lady says, " Listen to the log."

I say, "Look Log Lady, I am tired of the car problems that happen when you appear. You drop logs from the clear blue sky, and that log just tells me things I don't want to hear, can you just give me a break? Samsara is tough enough."

Well clearly, as usual, I had said the wrong words. She gave me a look I can't put into words. Looking into her eyes was like looking into the fires of hell. For the first time I got it about the "fear of God" in the Old Testament . I now know what the "Fear of God" feels like, and don't want to experience that again.

I shut up and listened to Log Ladies Log.

It said, "You must return to Pidgeons Gun Shop where David is suffering with Gallbladder cancer, today."

Oh who is David? I say below but he's been selling guns for 60 years, and to shake up my reality on occasion I'd like to go visit him.

I say, " Log Lady, I am praying for David and really like him, but it I keep going to his gun shop my liberal friends will think I joined the NRA. I don't really care what others think, but I am not sure I get the gun thing, don't feel one way or another, just personally, feel no need to have a gun."

Log Lady says "Shut up. You always talk, you never listen. Go to the gun shop now."

Subdued at this point, I meekly say "ok".

I wish I was just swimming at the river, instead I am off to the gun shop.

I pull into Pigeons driveway which leads to a house, you go down the steps to the basement then go through glass doors which open to an extensive arsenal and David sitting in his usual place, by the computer.

I can tell David is in pain, I ask him about the Gallbladder cancer, let him know I am praying for him. I can tell he appreciates it. He says, "Finally one of those damn doctors told me the truth, no matter what they do the cancer is too deep, they can't really remove it, I went through enough with chemo and radiation last year." 

I really feel his pain, the slow downsizing of his 60 year old business as his health declines, guns are his life, he knows things about weapons and guns almost no one knows anymore, when he is gone this knowledge will be lost to time.

I want to cheer him up. I say, "David, it is amazing what you have done over the last 60 years, who runs a business that long, and you have been doing what you love, how many can say that?"

His eyes brighten and he says with a twinkle in his eyes, "I have seen it all."

I say, "I know you have, you possess knowledge and wisdom that it takes living a life a certain way to know, I admire you, that is why I am here, and to tell you I care, and just want your cancer to go away."

David gives me a big grin, it is like we have know each other forever. And I then say, " I could care less if your politically correct or who you voted for, it makes no difference."

He looks at me in a way that tells me he stopped caring about politics a long time ago. He says, "They are all corrupt."

I say I agree, "The higher up you go in the world of power and wealth the more you are owned, you have to do certain things, ethics blur, you rise to the highest places of power, you gotta kill people, really this is true."

David smiles with his 80 years of life beginning to fade and says, "It has never been any different in this world."

He sighs, I can tell he is tired, I let him know the prayers will keep coming, that I am thinking of him, and will be back."

No words are needed to make me know that this makes him happy, he was divorced long ago, lives alone in the house above, he needs a friend.

He says, " Thank you, you are welcome anytime."

I go through the glass doors feeling like something positive had happened, and there she is again, Log Lady and her Log.

She says "Look into the log, see what's coming."

I don't want to look but I do.

First thing I remember is hearing jazz music, then seeing a neon sign in Amsterdam by a brothel saying "For madmen only: price of admission your mind." I am thinking "Why is Log Lady throwing this line from Hesse's Stepenwolf into the mix."

But I step through some sort of portal and next thing I know is I am in a car with Cassidy at the wheel, at least 80 miles an hour, talking non stop in a language I am too tired to even try to understand. 

He then says" "No worries, I am just taking you home where you can rest, but the adventure has only just begun, and once you cross over, once you begin the path, once you taste your true nature, once you experience real freedom, there is no going back, you will see me next, when you least expect it."

At this point I am so spent, the car Bill's, Log Lady stalking me with her talking Log, David at the gun shop, and then a crazy ride home with Cassidy. I am ready for the oblivion of sleep. 

But I say one last thing to Cassidy, I said, 

"Just for kicks I took a MA class in the hallowed halls of Academia, these kids have never heard of the Beats, you, Kerouac, Ginsburg, Burroughs. Some have never heard of Dylan, it amazes me, guess this is what getting old is like."

Cassidy just smiles, he says "We manifest in whatever way necessary in whatever time or place we are needed, this is just above your pay grade so just chill out and trust, everything has always been ok, and always will be ok."

Then he looks at me wrathfully and says, "If you learned how to listen you would know all this by now. So listen and know your words well before you start speaking."

Cassidy drives off into the night, I am exhausted, wishing Cassady did not have to leave exposing yet another fault, but he is right, I need to learn how to listen

The answer is blowing in the wind, just need too listen.

I relax and for a moment and am fully present in the night outside my house, hear the birds, sounds of animals in the woods, the stream out back, and I look up at the skies so vast with stars, and feel such gratitude for this precious human life, and such love and compassion for all my fellow travelers. 

The stars wink one last time, and I go to bed, drifting off into cotton clouds of silvery stuff, and dissolve back where I came from and never left . Last thought I remember is "There is nothing to do"

Then in my dreams I'm floating down the river of life underneath the clear blue sky, there is nothing to say, everything is perfect beneath the Great Eastern Sun.

Nothing to do, just be present in the moment, and make nothing of it.

***

There's much more to come with the story, and Log lady is going to become more terrifying in my reality.